I don't actually have a focused topic to write about today. So, I suppose if you don't want to read about what's going on in my head stop reading (duh).
I have less than three weeks left of my first semester of my freshman year. Crazy. What's crazier is how much I've changed since my parents and big sister drove away in August. My dad and I were just talking about that. It's amazing how tiny changes in your personality and growth add up to a new person. I like the new me though. I am confident, and I am strong. I have also learned how to make good life choices rather than shake my head and give up until someone bails me out.
So wish me luck as I work on my powerpoint, my 6 papers, and my 3 finals. Lets crank out those A's!
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
Monday, April 11, 2011
Rewind about Seven Years
Today I woke up and went to the Rec center where I ran two miles. Ok, I'm done bragging. You should know though, it felt AWESOME!
I had an excellent day today. After I woke up and worked out, I took a shower and promptly went back to sleep until it was time to go to class. I only have two classes on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays and they're back to back from 10-12. After class I went to Eleanor's psych class because I really enjoy psychology and wanted to get a sneak preview of Psych 105 which I will be taking in the fall. After this I went to work where I had a smooth and easy day. At 3 I convinced Eleanor to hang out with me some more (it wasn't hard, I'm pretty awesome) and then Amanda came over before we all headed to the dining center for dinner.
Dinner was really the best part of my day. It was like we were back in middle school, we talked about boys. Not only did we talk about boys we looked at them also. I believe in middle school terms we were "boy watching". For those of you who know Amanda, you can imagine what happened. For those of you who don't I will now describe it in great detail so you can use your imagination for the hilarity. (I suppose now is as good of time as any to tell you that, just like in middle school, we have code names-- I prefer to call them nicknames-- for boys. Really we have them for lots of guys in our lives but if a boy is especially nice, cute, or one of our friends has a crush on him, it's a safe bet that he has a nickname) The first thing that happened was I noticed Bswizzle (yes one of us has a crush on him) getting some water. Amanda had never seen Bswizzle before so I thought she would appreciate my pointing him out. As I was watching the students move through the cashier's line, I said "Hey Manda, Bswizzle is getting water right now" he was the only boy getting water. Instead of calmly looking over to where the water is dispensed Amanda half stands up and says (a lot louder than she meant to) "WHERE!" Of course everyone one at our table turns and looks at this poor boy who may or may not have seen me and the rest of my friends staring at him at this point.
Now not only did we see Bswizzle, but we also saw Whatshisfacenumberone (yes I know verrrrrrry creative name for him) within the next ten minutes. Amanda has seen this boy before but none the less, she wanted to sneak another peak at him. So I suggested she put her tray away so she'd have an excuse to walk by him. Of course following girl code when one gets up at least one more has to go with her. We trudged to the tray return while (less than) casually sneaking glances at him. Everyone seemed to not get caught except for me. A ninja I am not.
All in all, I had fun goofing around and acting like a middle school twit around cute boys. So, when faced with the option of being a complete spaz or playing it cool ask yourself this: 1. Will anyone see you being a complete and utter dork that has an impact on your future? 2. If this is the case, would this person seeing you be your true self (you know I'm right) cause significant damage to your academic, or professional life? 3. If the answer is no, but you're still afraid for personal reasons; do you really want to have a personal life where you can't be yourself?
I had an excellent day today. After I woke up and worked out, I took a shower and promptly went back to sleep until it was time to go to class. I only have two classes on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays and they're back to back from 10-12. After class I went to Eleanor's psych class because I really enjoy psychology and wanted to get a sneak preview of Psych 105 which I will be taking in the fall. After this I went to work where I had a smooth and easy day. At 3 I convinced Eleanor to hang out with me some more (it wasn't hard, I'm pretty awesome) and then Amanda came over before we all headed to the dining center for dinner.
Dinner was really the best part of my day. It was like we were back in middle school, we talked about boys. Not only did we talk about boys we looked at them also. I believe in middle school terms we were "boy watching". For those of you who know Amanda, you can imagine what happened. For those of you who don't I will now describe it in great detail so you can use your imagination for the hilarity. (I suppose now is as good of time as any to tell you that, just like in middle school, we have code names-- I prefer to call them nicknames-- for boys. Really we have them for lots of guys in our lives but if a boy is especially nice, cute, or one of our friends has a crush on him, it's a safe bet that he has a nickname) The first thing that happened was I noticed Bswizzle (yes one of us has a crush on him) getting some water. Amanda had never seen Bswizzle before so I thought she would appreciate my pointing him out. As I was watching the students move through the cashier's line, I said "Hey Manda, Bswizzle is getting water right now" he was the only boy getting water. Instead of calmly looking over to where the water is dispensed Amanda half stands up and says (a lot louder than she meant to) "WHERE!" Of course everyone one at our table turns and looks at this poor boy who may or may not have seen me and the rest of my friends staring at him at this point.
Now not only did we see Bswizzle, but we also saw Whatshisfacenumberone (yes I know verrrrrrry creative name for him) within the next ten minutes. Amanda has seen this boy before but none the less, she wanted to sneak another peak at him. So I suggested she put her tray away so she'd have an excuse to walk by him. Of course following girl code when one gets up at least one more has to go with her. We trudged to the tray return while (less than) casually sneaking glances at him. Everyone seemed to not get caught except for me. A ninja I am not.
All in all, I had fun goofing around and acting like a middle school twit around cute boys. So, when faced with the option of being a complete spaz or playing it cool ask yourself this: 1. Will anyone see you being a complete and utter dork that has an impact on your future? 2. If this is the case, would this person seeing you be your true self (you know I'm right) cause significant damage to your academic, or professional life? 3. If the answer is no, but you're still afraid for personal reasons; do you really want to have a personal life where you can't be yourself?
Sunday, April 10, 2011
Attitude is Everything
Yesterday I had lunch with my friends Eleanor and Chelsea. Somehow we got on the topic of having children (I'm secretly convinced that Chelsea, who is getting married this summer, steered the conversation with brain ninja skill) and I told Chelsea of the fact that when I have children I want four boys, and no girls. Chelsea was first shocked by this statement and then told me a story about her fiancé's mom who really wanted a girl, and was upset when she didn't have a girl and now her fiancé feels bad about it. But we're all glad Philip is a boy. She told me this story so that if I did have a girl I would think of Philip and how he felt because Chelsea didn't want my little girl to feel like that. My response to her? "I'm not gonna be upset if I have a girl, I'll take whatever God gives me."
Just for clarification: I'm 19 years old and not dating anyone, let alone pregnant. Talking about having kids and hearing Chelsea's story made me think about other aspects of my life and how I should have the attitude of "I'll be happy with whatever God gives me" so from now on, I'll be trying very hard to look at things with this attitude.
Just for clarification: I'm 19 years old and not dating anyone, let alone pregnant. Talking about having kids and hearing Chelsea's story made me think about other aspects of my life and how I should have the attitude of "I'll be happy with whatever God gives me" so from now on, I'll be trying very hard to look at things with this attitude.
Thursday, April 7, 2011
It's like quicksand
I have not been sleeping well. I would like to say it's because I've taken up the attitude that sleep is for underachievers and I have taken the time that I would have used for sleep to do homework and and be productive. Unfortunately this is not the case.
Have you ever known doing something is bad for you, but you do it anyways? And then you're worried about what people will think, making you want to hide it. The fact that you're worried about what people will think to the point that you'll hide it just reaffirms that you shouldn't have been doing it anyways. This dilemma is causing me to lose sleep and have really weird dreams (the other night I lit the school on fire).
Here's the issue. I know it's bad for me but I don't want to stop. And to make it even more complicated, talking to this person doesn't have to be bad for me... but it always turns out that way. So simple solution right? Stop talking to this person. Problem: I don't want to. Why, you ask? I don't know.
So... why am I writing this? To get my thoughts out and possibly get your advice and thoughts at the same time.
Things that have made my day:
Crazy dreams about random band kids that I don't really know. Getting a higher A on my GenEd than I did last time. Talking to my sister who I really miss. Lunch with Chelsea and Eleanor! And I'm sure there's more to come.
Have you ever known doing something is bad for you, but you do it anyways? And then you're worried about what people will think, making you want to hide it. The fact that you're worried about what people will think to the point that you'll hide it just reaffirms that you shouldn't have been doing it anyways. This dilemma is causing me to lose sleep and have really weird dreams (the other night I lit the school on fire).
Here's the issue. I know it's bad for me but I don't want to stop. And to make it even more complicated, talking to this person doesn't have to be bad for me... but it always turns out that way. So simple solution right? Stop talking to this person. Problem: I don't want to. Why, you ask? I don't know.
So... why am I writing this? To get my thoughts out and possibly get your advice and thoughts at the same time.
Things that have made my day:
Crazy dreams about random band kids that I don't really know. Getting a higher A on my GenEd than I did last time. Talking to my sister who I really miss. Lunch with Chelsea and Eleanor! And I'm sure there's more to come.
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